January 6, 2011

Tips for Sharing a Dorm Room with a Stranger

Sharing any small space with a total stranger can be stressful for anyone. Sharing a small, multi-purpose living space with a total stranger is just crazy. Too bad it's what millions of college freshmen face every single year. You're new to the school, so chances are your new roommate will be your first social connection. It's not unusual to become friends, though it is perfectly fine to just treat each other civilly. Sharing your dorm room with a new person can be awkward at first, but it is important to remember that this is an opportunity to practice the art of compromise. Here are some tips on how to share your new home.

Create Personal Space

The first thing in question when moving into any new territory, is personal space. Depending on how your dorm room is set up, you may have a common area, a bathroom, or simply rooms with beds. Whatever the situation is, be sure to communicate kindly and clearly about what space each person will need. Try not to take up more than your own share of the space. Maybe one person has more possessions than the other, but that is no reason to hog space. Try to consolidate and think of space-saving ideas. Try to divide the room equally. Consider purchasing a room divider or changing wall. These help create a sense of privacy in small rooms, are usually collapsable, and relatively easy to handle. Just having that small divider can make such a difference in perspective and create a feeling of more privacy.

Learn Your Roommate's Schedule

Everyone is going to run their days differently. The best way to not clash agendas and habits is to discuss each other's schedule. Learn when your roommate likes to study, have quiet time, or likes to go to bed. Try to coordinate with one another in a way that gives you both what you need. This is where the art of compromise comes in handy. Chances are, even after college you will be living with roommates. Learning how to compromise and live peacefully with different people will make you happier in the long run. You may also decide on some dorm room rules. For example, a rule like "no loud music after 10 p.m." makes it clear to all parties that quiet time is necessary. It may be wise to write down your schedules and place them where they are visible. This will help you both plan your day around each other. Placing a dry-erase board in a conspicuous place and communicating by writing daily messages can also help in coordinating schedules. It is also good to remember that college campuses usually offer libraries, cafes, lawns, and other areas you can go for personal time outside of the dorm room.

Create A Cleaning Schedule

Different humans have different habits. You may consider yourself a relatively clean person, but your roommate may have a whole different definition of "clean." Fortunately, the best way to get around opposing cleanliness standards is to create a cleaning schedule. Alternate responsibilities and make sure to have a check list of when chores are completed. Try to make the schedule as clear as possible to avoid confusion and arguments, and always do your best to contribute your part.

Be Friendly

You don't have to be friends with your roommate, but you can always be friendly. Being kind, honest, and open-minded will show that you deserve respect because you give respect. Be considerate and honest to your roommate. Chances are you will receive the same courtesy. If there are things that you can share in the room, share them if you want to. Trying to find common interests with your roommate can help break the ice and allow for more open communication. No one will blame you if you do your best to make the situation work. Finally, sometimes it may be necessary to admit that some combinations just don't work out, and you can always apply for a room change with your school. There is no pressure. After all, it's not a marriage, it's just a few semesters.

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